no one can call it objectifying women if you’re imagining yourself
as the woman when you’re watching porn, if you’re j-ing off while
contemplating being held down by someone stronger, made to do
whatever, bend this way suck that cock open this hole and smile.
i could never. i can submit but i need the semblance of control i
need to believe i could push the person off and fuck them up
if they went too far, not just hope they would heed my words.
i do not understand how women sleep with men.
in the bible God says let there be light and there is, He says
come to me and Peter walks on water, He says this is my body broken
for you and the world is redeemed, but human words just dissipate
like steam they don’t do anything.
once a man had my ear in his teeth and my ass in his hands. he had
to lean towards me he was so tall and when he asked me to leave
with him i wanted to. i wanted to say you can fuck me as long as
i can hold a knife but it would have been too awkward i went
to the bathroom, my hands were shaking i was so nervous,
i looked in the mirror and mouthed just go home. i ran
my hands under the cold water and found the back door.